WHY FIDELITY? Maggie responds too
Gynocentric? Well, yes actually. I have a strong bias in favor of the belief that men are supposed to protect and defend women and children. Most good men I know operate on some deep level on this belief, and there would be more good men if women gave them the slightest encouragement to do so.
But in this instance, I think in describing fidelity as a female thing, you are missing the mark widely. It is true that men can relate to women as friends-who-have-sex-together, what the kids call "fuck buddies." And it is true that women, in general, find this deeply distressing while men do not. But this kind of sexual relationship is not the basis of marriage, for men.
Fidelity, female fidelity that is, is deeply important to men in marriage in ways that go way beyond conscious choice. Men may be faithful themselves as a concession to women, but the idea of another man being with their wife will drive most normal men beyond the bend. Male sexual jealousy is a deep force of nature, which as I pointed out earlier, does not seem to be tripped in the same way by male-male sexual relationships, if Triplett's commments are any indication.
posted by maggie at
7:21 AM | link
Post a Comment
<< Home