TWO PARENTS VS. MOTHERS AND FATHERS: Matt Taylor and Elizabeth Marquardt at MarriageMovement.org

[Matt writes:] ...One might reply that same-sex parenting is not relevant to the topic at hand (divorce, single parenting, etc.), since gay couples, like infertile straight couples, cannot have children through sex. Fertile, straight adults, on the other hand, can take the shortest path to a child's happiness--marriage.

If marriage advocates were to support same-sex parenting, and same-sex marriage, as the most child-friendly option available to gays, it might deflate the sort of argument that you predict among straights. The central message would be that all parents should arrange their lives to the maximum benefit of their children. That straight couples can come much closer to the mother-father ideal than gay couples does not reduce the ideal's importance, nor does it demean gays to point out this obvious biological fact.

[Elizabeth replies:] ...Unfortunately, I don't think my fear that legalized SSM will undermine the mother-father norm can be easily offset by saying that SS couples, like infertile couples, cannot have children through sex. SS couples and infertile couples alike can use radical reproductive technologies to produce a child, and the use of these technologies is increasingly widely accepted. ...I think legalized SSM would only further institutionalize the use of these technologies. ...

...I agree that should be the central message. But the question is whether creating intentionally fatherless or motherless children, or claiming that any child does not need a father or mother, could ever be construed as adults "arranging their lives to the maximum benefit of their children."

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posted by Eve at 2:00 PM | link

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