LIBERATION VS. EQUALITY? From the Christian Science Monitor

...But if they have created a united front to state lawmakers, the gay community itself is divided on whether marriage is the right priority.

Many gays and lesbians plan to wed. Many others will not. Some want to marry as a legal protection or as the only nondiscriminatory way to validate their love. But marriage is also seen as a flawed institution, as a conservative step backward, unwinding years of work to redefine notions of family.

"There is a difference between liberation and equality," says Joan Tronto, a professor of political science at Hunter College who was active in the women's liberation movement and has no intention of marrying her partner of 10 years. "Politically it is easier to say, 'Let us in. We're just like you.' But it takes away some of the radical edge."

The difference in attitudes often falls along generational lines. Charles Martel, a Boston psychotherapist whose clients include many gay couples, says marriage seems natural to younger couples, especially those with children. Meanwhile, older clients, many of whom fought to restructure the definition of family in the 60s and 70s, are more mistrustful. ...

Indeed, Ms. Tronto suspects she's one of a few "holdouts" left. ...

Kenneth Sherrill, a colleague of hers at Hunter College, was not much of an activist for same-sex marriage--until he got married himself in Canada this summer, to his partner of 36 years.

Initially the couple looked at it as a purely legal arrangement. "I thought it wouldn't be that different than going to a lawyer's office and signing a contract," he says. "But it had the most incredible emotional impact. ... I was fighting off tears during the ceremony."

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