ADULT CHILDREN OF SAME-SEX COUPLES: Stacey Simon

[Stacey Simon is an attorney in New York City.]

I felt compelled to reply to Cassidy and say you are the exception NOT the rule. I am the daughter of two moms. I am now 30 years old. I am an attorney in New York City, with a successful career and am married -- to a man. I have always felt nothing but love and joy in my household with my two moms.

I grew up without any complexes about my mothers' sexuality, but instead grew up with an open mind and without the prejudices most kids have. My dating and sexual relationships with men and my friendships with women have always been fulfilling, perfectly normal and comfortable.

I also grew up knowing several other families like mine, with gay parents. All of those children, including myself, were (and are) happy humans and all grew up to be straight (heterosexual), married with children and successful careers.

I am a firm believer that anyone with love and compasssion to share with a child shoud be a parent and thier sexuality should be irrelevant to their capacity to love a child. There are enough heterosexual couples who have children who should NOT be parents. A heterosexual couple is no better equipped to be parents just because the household it is comprised of a man and a woman. And maybe some gay couples shouldn't be parents, but not because they are gay, for the same reasons that some heterosexual couples shouldn't be parents -- not everyone is cut out for parenthood. We shouldn't be so quick to draw lines -- homosexuals make bad parents and heterosexuals make good parents -- that's preposterous and narrow minded!

Maybe Cassidy's parents wouldn't have made good parents if they were a part of a heterosexual couple either. Maybe they weren't capable of the love and support that is necessary to be a parent. On the other hand - if Cassidy grew up with love and support and that just wasn't enough, I seriously doubt that any heterosexual couple could have given her what she needed to make her happy. Another note to Cassidy -- instead of feeling like a science experiment -- you should have the mentality of an adopted child . . . your parents wanted you enough to find a way to have you instead of other couples who go "oops -- the condom broke so I guess we're having a baby".

I and many other children I have come to know who were raised in gay households are very happy and well adjusted humans and do not feel cheated in any way. In fact, I have a greater capacity for tolerance so that I feel better off than other people I know.

And I do not say this out of fear for speaking the truth--it is the truth!
posted by Eve at 7:38 PM | Link |

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