SANDRA BULLOCK ON MARRIAGE: Various

[Okay, so this is the kind of news story in which I have exactly no interest: Apparently S. Bullock was quoted as saying, "Why is marriage the pinnacle for everyone? People get married for the wrong reasons. We need to start looking at different packages, whether it's living together, or being with six partners or dedicating your life to taking care of flowers." This quote did, though, spark an interesting if scattershot discussion in the comments here. Some snippets of the discussion (all quotes from different commenters):]

"At the risk of sounding like a Republican (I'm a lifelong Democrat and I don’t even want people to THINK I might be a Republican!), marriage has a place in our society. It really is good for the stability of society and the family. As far as I'm concerned that goes for same sex marriages. Who isn't for stability and love? It's not a question of need but if Sandra B. decides to have children, having two parents at home is a lot better for kids. Take it from me. Kids are harder to raise than you think. They are cute and cuddly when they are infants but they grow up fast and are a lot of work and cost a lot of money. Two heads are beter than one."

............

"Marriage is more compatible with many aspects of human nature, resulting in a society which does not have to spend as much time/energy/resources socializing people into accepting one of its building blocks. It still requires socialization -- but not as much as the constant re-education needed to get people to accept a modern communal style of living. (For example, compare the efforts required to establish and continue the kibbutzes in Israel. It's not impossible, but it takes a lot less energy to perpetuate a society built around marriage than it does to perpetuate one built around other concepts.)"

.............

"Family structures are often driven by economics. Whether hunter-gatherers, medieval nobles, or modern Americans, how people arrange their romantic relationships, living arrangements and childcare is driven in large part by what works economically. The atomic family unit is specific to historical periods and economic situations, as is the hunter-gatherer band and the clan system of the Scottish highlands.

"So, in that sense, there's something too simple about generalizing to human nature from any time's or place's family relationship. The fact is, humans have made so many changes to our environments, and have socialized each other so much, that it is very difficult to say what 'human nature' is."

............

"By the way, I'm an adult who lives with a 15-month-old girl and her parents (among other folks). The arrangement means that there are more adults around to watch the toddler; less isolation from adult company, compared to what some (not all) other parents experience; and it means that her parents can afford to go to college. If you read the literature on communal housing arrangements, intentional households, and intentional communities, you'd run into plenty of articles written by parents who find it an excellent arrangement for raising children."

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posted by Eve at 8:50 PM | link

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