I argue against same-sex marriage in part because I think the gay and lesbian community barely understands marriage, particularly the part about fidelity.

Thus, I am accused of extrapolating the nonmonogamy of a few gay couples to an entire community, and reminded of the widespread cheating and swinging in the straight community.

But my concern is not about the extent of extramarital sex in each community. It's about the vast gulf in attitudes between gays and straights on whether a promise to be sexually exclusive is an essential component of a proper marriage. ...

If you hear gay people objecting to the argument that same-sex marriage is fundamentally different from marriage, ask them if they consider sexual exclusivity (don't say monogamy because they might answer using the gay definition) an essential part of a proper marriage. Feel free to ask straight people the same question. Then you decide based on what you hear.

posted by Imapp Staff at 7:10 PM | link

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