DOES HAVING KIDS MAKE YOU HAPPY?: Lorraine Ali at Newsweek

says no:

...The most recent comprehensive study on the emotional state of those with kids shows us that the term "bundle of joy" may not be the most accurate way to describe our offspring. "Parents experience lower levels of emotional well-being, less frequent positive emotions and more frequent negative emotions than their childless peers," says Florida State University's Robin Simon, a sociology professor who's conducted several recent parenting studies, the most thorough of which came out in 2005 and looked at data gathered from 13,000 Americans by the National Survey of Families and Households. "In fact, no group of parents--married, single, step or even empty nest--reported significantly greater emotional well-being than people who never had children. It's such a counterintuitive finding because we have these cultural beliefs that children are the key to happiness and a healthy life, and they're not." ...

For the childless, all this research must certainly feel redeeming. As for those of us with kids, well, the news isn't all bad. Parents still report feeling a greater sense of purpose and meaning in their lives than those who've never had kids. And there are other rewarding aspects of parenting that are impossible to quantify. For example, I never thought it possible to love someone as deeply as I love my son.

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(Eve notes: It seems that many of the relationships which give us a sense of purpose, wholeness, love, or meaning are also among the most stressful things: Love is reassuring, but also tiring! Perhaps our real difficulty is that we too often conflate happiness or "emotional well-being" with sense of meaning or purpose, when in fact they're quite distinct....)
posted by Eve at 9:13 PM | link

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